Breaking free from mental and emotional abuse

In her book, The Fly Dancer (see previous post "Hoe gaan dit met die vroue en kinders in jou streek?"), author Catherine Jenkins describes the rebirth of a woman who breaks the chains of a relationship of mental and emotional abuse.
     In his foreword to the book, clinical-pastoal psychologist Fanie Kriel says he believes it is a book that will rset people free. He also expresses appreciation for the fact that the book apportions no blame.
     "Cinderallas will remain barefooot at the coal stove while others depart for the Ball unless they take control of their lives," he writes. "...God destined us all to live triumphant an joyful lives, but sometimes we miss the turnoffs or take a detour by embracing wrong thinking along our life's journey. We can get back onto Destiny Road."
     That is exactly what Skye, the main character in The Fly Dancer, does.
     In the second chapter, "The Judge and the Jury", Skye muses about the strange way in which her husband loved her:

     "Calan loved her with a strange kind of love, a love that epitomised everything that is capricious. It was unpredictable, impulsive, unstable, volatile.
     "Perhaps if he'd married someone else, he would have loved differently.
     "Real love loves naturally, like the sun rising every morning. Even after a particularly dark night, real love lives on. It is consistent and uncontrived.
     "Real love is spontaneous, like the flight and song of a bird... It is sociable and takes care of its young.
      "Capricious love is different...
      "...(it) chokes real love until its head lolls to one side and the eyelids close in final surrender. Love lives on, but with its eyes closed. It no longer sees the beauty it once saw, the beauty it was meant to see forever. The heart beats to a perfect rhythm, until, without warning, it beats with an irregular and breathless beat, flashing rage in all directions.
     "Without warning, without reason, without mercy.
     "Somewhere in his adult life or childhood, Calan had a skirmish with capricious love. He was like a beautiful tiger that had been caught in the jaws of a leghold trap. He was a tiger with a mangled paw, walking with a limp. Calan had a love limp.
     "I din't want a perfect love, I only wanted a normal love. Instead, I was constantly put down, made to feel confused and hurt, exposed to frequent small shocks. I was stunned, wondering how I could be hearing what I was hearing, wondering what I could have said or done, feeling isolated, being called names, disparaged and cut to the quick. I was kept off balance, even while I sought to nurture and understand the relationship."
     Eventually, this cinderella frees herself of the bonds of mental and emotional abuse and the book poetically describes the story of a woman who wins her life back:
     "My soul has a clean white page. Now is my chance. Now is the time to paint with new colours."
     Eventually she does what is necessary:  She takes up the brush - she takes the first step to freedom.